Saturday, October 9, 2010

It get's easier everyday...

Yes, i believe that now. You were the one who said it. I struggled to get through the week while anxiously waiting for Friday to come. And Friday came, my worst fear was confirmed. But my question is-- why? Why did you choose to talk about it there? You said you dont want to involve others but in a way, you already did. Did you seriously think of me that way? In my defence I will not try and defend myself or what I have done to you but the truth is I didnt know it has that effect on you. I'm not an asshole  idiot to keep doing it if I knew it would offend you. And I treasure my friends more than my ego cos if I dont, I wont spend the past days apologizing and grovelling. Yes, I am not perfect-- I didnt claim i was. That was character assasination You even managed to use those things i told you in confidence and rub it in my face. In confidence....I told you those in confidence. It never occur to me to use whatever personal stuff you confided in me against you, and i never will.

Now my question is  'why?'. Why did you choose to discuss matters in the open? thank you for putting me in my place but for me you are never the girl i met from some place who is not even related to me but my best friend. I'm an idiot for assuming It's presumptuous of me to assume you feel the same way about me.

And back to my question, Why? Is it for the hits? Is it so you can go up the ladder/ rank?

I cried, i really did. And now, I'm still hurting. But every time i read what you wrote, i realize, it gets better everyday. I dunno what you motives were, but as for me, you were my best friend.

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